Angry

I'm angry.

I spent the better part of the last two days applying for jobs, talking to recruiters and family and friends. I signed up for a work-at-home program. I won't do anything with it until I receive the products so I can be sure I believe in them.

I'm angry.

I was able to take this week to play catch up after being gone all last week on vacation. I was able to do my laundry and clean up my house and answer my phone and apply for more jobs.

I'm angry.

I continually think about being let go from the best company (yes, and boss) that I have ever worked for. I can't stop bawling about it.

I'm angry.

Why am I suddenly not good enough to be his assistant? Why take me away from my home away from home, where he knew I was happiest and most fulfilled? Why tell me all will work out in the end when I haven't seen anything working out yet? Why let me go so early that he is using another assistant to help him out when I could have done it and not overloaded her (who was already overloaded to begin with)? Why give me a good severance package to make me feel better about being let go, when all I wanted to do (and still do) was stay and do my job, do it well and continue working with some of the best people I've ever known?

I'm angry.

And I can't sleep.